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Ep 94His Wedding Only Cost $23,000 - Here's How
1:14

Tuition & simchas · 1:14

The whole package is $23,000, all in, both sides

Mayer Gold

Ep 94May 20, 2025

His Wedding Only Cost $23,000 - Here's How

with Mayer Gold

You're not a restaurant, you're a chasuna.

Mayer Gold

More moments · 7

1:23
My in-laws offered us the difference and I said no way
0:47
People think that people think about them
1:16
You can't overspend for 20 years and then stop at the wedding
1:09
$10,000 for a wall of flowers no one even noticed
0:57
Why do 20-year-olds need $20,000 watches?
0:56
The first thing we have to do is be normal
0:41
He already got everything, so what do you buy for his first birthday?

Try this · top 3

Quotes

“I'm not taking my 500 closest friends out to dinner.”

Mayer Gold

“You may want to look at a wedding hall in your tax bracket.”

Mayer Gold (recalling a friend's advice before his first wedding)

“If you want your kids to have a bad marriage, fight with [the other side]. It's guaranteed going to happen.”

Mayer Gold

“Nobody knows and nobody cares.”

Mayer Gold (on the $2.39 candle centerpieces that drew compliments)

“We never had extra money, but we never felt poor.”

Mayer Gold

“If the stamp costs more than the invitation, you spend too much money on the invitation.”

Mayer Gold

“It's not about being cheap. It's a mindset.”

Mayer Gold

Takeaways

  1. 1 In some circles a single wedding costs $120,000-130,000, roughly a year of the average American family's income.
  2. 2 Gold's fifth wedding cost $23,000 all in for both sides (food, music, photography and flowers) at a hall with a fixed package and no add-ons. There was plenty of food and guests loved it.
  3. 3 Keys to the low cost: the hall's rules, a tight schedule, the main course before the first dance, and 350 seats shared by guests who came at different times.
  4. 4 His first bar mitzvah centerpieces were craft-store candles at about $2.39 a table, and people still praised them.
  5. 5 His daughter did the vort flowers from Trader Joe's for $139, versus about $2,000 from a florist, and the flowers were reused at other simchas.
  6. 6 Costs creep through extras: bedeken flower walls up to $10,000, makeup artists at $1,500-3,000, wedding dressers around $2,000, and ever-growing chosson and kallah gift lists including Rolex watches.
  7. 7 Middle-income families feel the most pressure because they worry what wealthier friends will think. Social media shows only part of the story.
  8. 8 Children learn spending norms at home over years, not in one conversation at engagement.
  9. 9 Rav Aharon Leib Steinman had no sheva brachos after his own wedding and made only one modest one for each of his children.
  10. 10 Some communities are funding affordable halls. Programs offer interest-free wedding loans and help setting up a home.
  11. 11 Host Eli Langer regrets choosing a fancier hall instead of taking his in-laws' offer of the price difference.

Full episode

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